THE AISLE SEAT - by Mike McGranaghan

"LEGENDS OF THE SUPERHEROES"

Legends of the Superheroes is something I would have thought was awesome as a kid in the 1970's (and maybe I did and just don't remember it), but now think is a delightfully embarrassing relic of a particularly cheesy era of TV entertainment. Done in that 70's "variety show" style, it has a bunch of actors wearing bad make-up and cheap spandex costumes, playing to the rafters as they deliver a series of lame, obvious jokes on cheap-looking sets. There's even a pervasive laugh track, to tell you what you're supposed to find funny. The proceedings, which appear to have barely been rehearsed, remind me of "The Donny and Marie Show" except with superheroes. And yet it's this insipient awfulness that makes Legends of the Superheroes such a curiosity. It is to the DC comics universe what "The Star Wars Christmas Special" is to the George Lucas universe.

This vintage piece of kitsch has now been remastered and released via Warner Archive, and can be ordered from their website.

Part one, "The Challenge," has a legion of supervillians, including the Riddler (Frank Gorsham), unleashing a doomsday device. They give their foes - a band of superheroes such as Batman (Adam West), Robin (Bert Ward), and the Green Lantern - one hour to find and defuse it. This leads to a series of pathetically unfunny scenes. In one, the villains sabotage the Batmobile, leaving Batman and Robin to go shopping for a used car they can drive. As the kids all say in text messages, O…M…G! Later on, Captain Marvel matches wits with the Riddler, who is pretending to be - wait for it! - a psychiatrist! There's even a climactic jet ski chase. Because when in doubt, toss in a jet ski chase.

The second part, if you can believe it, is even more deliciously awful. Entitled "The Roast," it has special guest Ed McMahon hosting an event in which the costumed crime fighters are assembled so that the villains can poke good-natured fun at them. The results are like "Laugh-In" as written by imbeciles. McMahon, upon seeing the guests, quips, "Look at all those capes. This looks like Truman Capote's closet." [Insert rimshot here.] Some cut-rate comedians of the day cameo to mock the heroes as well. In one bit that now seems politically incorrect, an African-American comic is introduced as "Ghetto Man." That's pretty bad. And then Ruth Buzzi shows up. Ruth Freakin' Buzzi!

Legends of the Superheroes is a product of a time when comic book characters were not taken seriously. Hollywood hadn't yet figured out that they held the potential for use in smart, gripping stories that reflected the ills of our society. And so they were treated as nothing more than fodder for stupid slapstick and boneheaded one-liners. Thankfully, the superhero genre has come a long way. Long enough, in fact, that it's totally possible to sit, watch, and have fun mercilessly ridiculing the slip-shod absurdity of this misguided two-part special.

Legends of the Superheroes also comes with about seven minutes of deleted scenes and outtakes.